It is normal for people to get into relationships with a lot of expectations. For instance, we all want our relationships to blossom into something breathtaking that can last for more than a lifetime. However, it is even more common for the strongest relationships to come into an impromptu end. While this can result from one partner practicing infidelity, it can also result from both of you not seeing eye to eye on certain important aspects of your relationship.
In the worst case scenario, this situation will lead to a breakup where you will be forced to live your own separate lives, but having signed an unexpired apartment lease together makes the situation even more complicated. Amidst the pain, it is tough for one partner to lower their ego and move out in the interest of their former partner. If you are in this kind of situation, you will have to make such a decision to allow yourself enough time to heal.
Here is a short guide to help you decide on who keeps the apartment:
Why Can’t You Keep On Living Together?
Before the breakup, you will be wondering about what to do if she cheats on you. Since you are no longer together now, however, she will get a free pass to date anyone she wants, but it can be hurtful to see your ex bring another guy into your former apartment while you are living there. This will tamper with your healing process.
Furthermore, it might be mentally languishing to live with an ex until the lease expires. You need to rediscover who you were before you met your ex in order to move on truly, and having them around you can make this tough. Although living separately will mean double the bills for both of you, the serenity it brings is worth it.
So, Who Will Move Out?
In most cases, the person that initiated the breakup should be the one to move out. However, there is no standard script to decide who gets to move out and who gets to keep the apartment. Sometimes it will take you being the bigger person and moving out of the apartment. Furthermore, getting into a new environment will speed up the healing process. In case you feel that seeing sentimental and nostalgic pieces of your relationship lying around in the apartment will make the place look depressing, then moving out might be the best option for you.
Customize Your New Environment Post-Breakup
Regardless of whether you get to keep the apartment or not, getting rid of things that remind you of your ex might be a great move in the quest to heal quickly from the breakup. While you were still dating, the interior design of your home used to be a mix of your personalities. Breaking up allows you to customize the place to fit your personal preferences.
If you move out, doing this will be quite easy as you will have an empty apartment to fill. If you don’t want to stay in the property anymore, there are services for a vacant property which allow people to live in the property and you can live elsewhere.
In case you retain your old apartment, decide on the things that you would love to change such as the color of the walls or even the furniture in the apartment. You can also take down pictures of you and your ex and replace them with happy pictures of you before you met her.
Find Yourself Before Dating Again
It is common for people to lose the meaning of who they really are when they get into a relationship, but this comes to haunt them once the relationship ends. Of course, the breakup gives you enough time to hang out with your friends while having fun. However, you will never get to truly move on if the things that weigh your heart down are still present in your life.
Walk the self-discovery path and learn a little bit more about yourself. While some people choose to use art and other self-expression activities to do this, others can choose to take a vacation to clear their mind. Simply put, choose an activity that will put you in the serene state that you need in order to learn more about your life without your ex.
Sure, you can get the apartment all to yourself after the breakup, but it will forever haunt you if you do not allow yourself to truly heal. Only then can you actually meet someone else who will be much more influential in your life than your ex. In case you decide to move out, ensure that you have your name removed from the lease.